LAMED is an anagram for MEDALMar 27, '11 8:14 PM
for everyone
there are two sides to everything..here's my negative point of view regarding getting medals...as if it wasn't obvious, i write this because mia has just informed me that i have received another medal...
THE POEM:
Why do you haunt me o piece of metal?
They want you but i want you not at all
Carve not my name on your proud surface
It's not like you can catch me when i fall
Why do you haunt me o symbol of achievement?
So many have coveted you in many a tournament
I, without even trying to, have claimed you
yet you cause me such bereavement
Relieve me o sign of triumph
from yourself and of all like you
for i know deep down you cannot make me whole
having you but hides what's true
Haunt me no more medal
I know what you do
You cannot really appreciate me
And I have learned to hate you
for the record, there's more
LAMED is and anagram for MEDAL -and why not? Had i not felt that these pieces of metal, in truth, weigh me down and at some point, lame me?
WHY should I keep it?
It cannot love me
It doesn't give me a sense of accomplishment any longer
It doesn't provide me company, not even bad company
It's a reminder that I'm not what they expect me to be
It's a constant cause for people to exclaim things like "You could be great." (Am I not enough as i am?)
It distract people's attention from the important things, like the immaterial, intangible
It takes up space that could have held a picture of someone smiling
It does not put a smile on my face
It's an empty promise
I do not want to be remembered as a name on some cold metal. I'd rather not be remembered at all
It stands for rivalry and competition...that i despise
It makes me feel guilty, like i stole it from someone who wants it more
It doesn't make me feel that i deserve it
It doesn't make me who i am, instead, it makes me something they expect me to be but am not
Would throw it for a hug
Would crush it for a kiss
Would bury it for a friend
Would give it away for a sincere smile
would leave it for fun
would trade it for laughter
would forget it in exchange for happy memories
would replace it with a picture
would let it go for freedom and peace of mind
on the POSITIVE side...dad told me, think of it as something from God, a validation that He's given you gifts, blessings, talent and that you should use it for His glory and to disregard the medal is to be ungrateful for that...
Love you God...I'm sorry I'm an ungrateful girl. Mom said YOu just want me to be happy, that every parent just want their child to be happy...medals don't make me happy, Lord.. they just make me depress, make me remember of a time when what i do use to mean something, a time when i wasn't so tired...
I love you God...and i don't really want anything...me receiving just makes me feel like im a burden..i'd rather not receive and just stay in your presence...i will never be in want with You by my side...so let them take it all away from me, 'cause i'll let them all go for YOU